It’s the thought that counts. Right?

I’m invited to a baby shower next month, hosted by a good friend who just happens to be a multi-billionaire. With a B. The shower is for her daughter who is due in March.

The venue in the city is a roof top with a view and if the shower is anything like the incredible wedding they pulled off two years ago, I’m doomed. Try picking out a wedding gift from a registry that has $1200/place setting china!!! One tea cup please. Hold the saucer.

Now, at the baby shower, it’s going to be pretty hard to be the one who brings a $9.95 baby blanket from Target when the other guests (many celebs and otherwise well-known peeps) are setting out huge bags from Baby Bergdorf.

I’ve never ever been made to feel poor by my friend (she and her husband both grew up of modest means and stay true to those values) but but but when at an occasion like this, when surrounded by so much wealth, it’s hard to be the church mouse.

I can’t decide if I should accept or decline the invite. I’m inclined to regret then send a present once the baby is born, maybe something monogrammed or maybe I knit or needlepoint a personalized gift. That’s more my style. I can’t imagine the moment at the shower when the mom-to-be asks “who sent THIS?” 😬

I have some time to think about my decision. Meanwhile, I’m waiting to get an AOK text from Mr. EOS who is in RI undergoing a colonoscopy. Fun times!

Happy Tuesday.

23 thoughts on “It’s the thought that counts. Right?

  1. Accept the baby shower invitation. You were asked because they like you and want you to be there. At the last two baby showers I attended, the most admired gifts were hand knit sweaters.
    Practical gifts may be popular but they aren’t much fun to give or get.

    1. I’m on the fence. As I said, not once have I ever been made to feel poor by this friend and if it were a smaller affair, with a few close friends, I’d go in a flash but the bride is famous in her own right, in the media constantly with lots of celeb friends so it might not be the best place to try and be low key. I’ll let you know what I decide.

  2. I might not go. I can thoroughly understand your point. Living as long as I have in Greenwich, I’ve been invited to my fair share of over the top events that have left me with a bad taste in my mouth.

    1. I do not begrudge the wealth this family has acquired. They worked hard to earn every penny and are very generous giving back. It’s not that the shower will be over the top either, it’s that it’ll likely be heavily Instgrammed and professionally photographed and I don’t fit into the spotlight crowd. I was surprised to be invited to this particular event, sure there will be more than one.

      1. I go back to my original comment. You were invited because they would like you to come. I get the sense that some people will be invited for professional, political, business or whatever reasons. Not you. You’re actually a special guest- a close, personal friend.
        My experience at the few truly over the top events I’ve attended is being completely ignored by photographers and press. I’m not going to sell newspapers unless I take a job at 7-11.
        The choice is yours but unless you think you’ll be very uncomfortable there, go and have a good time.
        There’s a Baby Bergdorf?

        1. I hear you loud and clear Swanton. I suspect I’d sit at the table with my friend, the mother of the mom-to-be – she’s been a friend for nigh onto 30 years and yes, I DO know she really extended the invitation in earnest. She knows I never judge or am envious of her wealth and when they were shopping for weekend homes in the $15-20m range, she’d send me links to ask ME what I thought. She’s comfortable knowing I don’t care she can spend that money and she knows too by showing me the links it’s not showing off. I’m sure I’d have fun at the shower.

          Baby Bergdorf is alive and well, ready for you to spend lots of dollars for the most deserving babies.

  3. I’m appalled that they’d register for gifts at all. So tacky, IMO. Anyone I know who has serious wealth — and we’re talking waaaaaay less than billions — wouldn’t dream of it. Even here in flashy Greenwich. Why? Well, other than the fact that you appear either greedy or cheap, it’s precisely to avoid the discomfort those with less money feel trying to give a gift “worthy” of someone fabulously wealthy. Given that, it’s not an event that I’d attend.

    1. No gift registry for baby shower. Yes for wedding. Like many ultra wealthy sensitive to receiving big gifts, they also gave guests the option of making a donation to a charity they chose. The wedding gift registry didn’t seem tacky to me, only steep but when I went to look at buying something, I noticed most everything had already been purchased.

  4. Oh I think you should go and enjoy every minute of the shower! They really want you there and are going to the expense, albeit mighty, to please you and the others. As for a present…..never mind the fancy stuff. Something you create yourself is a very special and caring gift. Gear up for a wonderful time….we can’t wait to hear all about this baby shower when it happens!

      1. I don’t know how fast you work, but something absolutely unique, for which all my daughters-in-law clamored, was hand-designed and stitched Christmas needlepoint stockings, with motifs specific to each child. Have them professionally finished. It will be treasured and brought out through the years. Bibi

        1. I’ve done needlepoint Christmas stockings for the kids – Mr. EOS and I hang the ones we had as children, my so 1940s, cut from one piece of red felt. I think those things are too personal to be given outside the family but I have on many occasions needlepointed pillows with the child’s initials or name etc. I’ll probably make something -even if I don’t go.

        2. I vote you go, too. But don’t needlepoint a stocking! It is a huge endeavor! I am now crunching (procrastinating) to finish my youngest sons stocking this year. The last part is santas beard, and I’m making it fuzzy. So, I’m not loving the results and it keeps getting put off. I have to get it into the finishers by Halloween to have it for Christmas. Plus, it is not inexpensive. Grandma territory 😉

      1. So very glad to hear it. My own girls underwent the procedure, just as precaution to rule out genetic problems after their brother’s death, and all was well. My own take on the matter is that, despite mother nature’s offering such a convenient portal to check things out, the “taboo” nature of that entry point shames many of us from undergoing a rectal exam. Stupid, sometimes fatal pride, but I know I resisted myself until, ironically, just a few months before my own son’s examination. I was fine, John wasn’t. How I wish the results were different.

        1. Makes sense that your girls would undergo the procedure given John’s cancer, and yes, given the choice, most parents would wish any illness happens upon them and not the child. My own kids have not had a colonoscopy, that I know of. The daughter of one of my closest friends, age 31, had brain surgery three days ago, for cancer that started so small in another part of her body, was treated and went away, and now reappeared, in her brain. She underwent a 5 hour surgery and seems fine, although the doctors found two other tumors in her brain that they felt they didn’t want to remove during surgery so she’s having radiation. What I didn’t know about radiation is that she, as a a mom of a two year old, can not hug him. I guess they fear the radiation will “radiate” into the child’s body. Thankfully, there are two sets of grandparents to help care for the little boy while the husband takes some time off from work to be by his wife’s side. My youngest and this woman grew up together so there’s lots of closeness to her and her whole family. Her closest friends are paying for a food delivery service that is geared specifically for cancer patients, vegan, so she doesn’t have to think about that aspect of every day life.

          Kinda puts perspective on having a colonoscopy rod shot up your butt. It’s a non-negotiable procedure I feel and Mr. EOS doesn’t balk. We women are good at hounding our men to take care of themselves. And vice-versa.

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