If he’d lower the price to $240m…..


Tons of hype yesterday about the Most Expensive House in America – a cool $250 million sheckels. Every news outlet I tripped across had at least one story or tweet, even the WSJ. Oh my. But hey, that says the PR folks behind the house sale are doing their job, so I guess kudos?

Sensory warning, the link to the house starts with an alarmingly loud and obnoxious Lucas-like intro video… click your mute button before playing. Not kidding.

924 Bel Air Road, Los Angeles (oh, excuuuuse me, that’s Bel Air, California)

Just like my house……. The house succeeds in transcending the bounds of the typical home, and dually functioning as a multi-sensory, all-powerful experience for all who enter it.

I will give the house A+++ for the pool and views…this is awesome, but really.. the TV? Kind of in the way and wouldn’t the sun make it impossible to see anything on the screen? Asking for a friend.

As you might imagine, the house has every conceivable amenity that a multi-billionaire would deem necessary…

Who doesn’t need a bowling alley?

Of course, a movie theater. Gotta have Meryl Streep and Leo over to chat their latest dud films.

The gym, duh, gotta stay fit and trim for those red carpet photos.

The place DOES look cool at night – gotta give it that much.

I know I’d wanted to keep my helicopter on the roof but silly Bedford has regulations about such things. I kinda imagine Bel Air does too so this isn’t actually gonna ever happen. Agree?

The room that confused me the most is one the listing calls The Lounge. Just what lounging happens here? Looks like the waiting room for a car dealership to me …

…and maybe that’s exactly what it is because the house comes complete with a car collection

I don’t see this listing disappearing off the books any time soon. Who is the target buyer? A Russian? Putin himself. Maybe Al Gore, giving up on his climate change hoax? Barry and Michelle?

I’m out. Way too ostentatious for me. But I’d like to take a dip in the pool. Who’s in with me?

12 thoughts on “If he’d lower the price to $240m…..

    1. Can you imagine any realtor hiring me and my snark to write listing copy? I can’t. Although, funny you should say that because I have already written copy for my own house when it comes time to sell.

      Skip this house if you want an open concept floor plan, high ceilings, all the bedrooms on one floor, and low property taxes. Otherwise, a great home!

  1. The problem for me wouldn’t be living in this house. It would be if I lived next door and the owner buzzed his helicopter over me and had late night parties – all without inviting me.

    1. I wondered why anyone would need a candy room in the first place (I don’t see a couple with five kids living there but I do see some old leach wanting to have his way with young starlets who might enjoy a candy room. The house could be renamed Candy Land for that matter…)

      ANYWAY, love Clint’s home.Just like he is. No nonsense. No frills.The view…aaah. Buy it.

  2. I’m back in California with the grandchildren while my son and his wife “get away from the horror that is tomorrow’s inauguration”. They actually said that.

    I’ll watch the whole days events, get the grandkids indoctrinated properly, then leave Sunday!

    1. Jane, you worry me so much when you disappear for great lengths of time. Glad you are in sunny California. I fell off my chair laughing at your grandmotherly duty to properly indoctrinate the kidlets. Yes yes yes.

      Have a safe trip home. Get back here before the snow storm Monday.

  3. I’ll meet you at the pool. I’ll be the one in the Land’s End bathing suit with an attached skirt. Do you think they’ll offer us lunch? I hope so.

    1. Ha ha.

      Considering the house has a huge exercise room, if we do get lunch, it will probably be once slice of cucumber and a lettuce leaf. We can skip out early and head to In ‘n Out Burger. Deal?

      1. Let’s just fill a bag with candy & leave this tribute to excess & bad taste. We’ll take the helicopter to Clint’s. It’s much nicer & the food will be better.

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