This Story is Really Full of Sheets

Remember when we shopped for and came home with a fun new adjustable bed??

Heads or tails?
Heads or tails?

And then we spent a fortune buying specialized mattresses covers and sheets for them??

Well, Craigslist here they come. Maybe.

The beds are IMPOSSIBLE to make. And we haven’t even bought a frame that would surely further complicate making the beds.

First of all, the manufacturer of the beds recommended a full surround zippered EZ mattress cover but it has a slippery quality about it, so the fitted sheet has a very difficult time staying put, unlike when we used a quilted mattress cover on our old traditional king bed where the fitted sheet stayed snug.

The fitted sheet skitters all over the mattress cover, creating creases and pockets and lumps and bumps, oh my. I am The Princess of The Princess and The Pea and my sheets must be flat and tucked in and neat. These are anything but. Awful.

The flat sheet and blanket go all askew too, like a tornado went off or there’s an abundance of wild sex going on. (Did she really say that?)

In order to make the beds, the two halves have to be pulled apart and you have to squeeze in-between the two mattresses to make each side. Pain in the patootie!!!

Then the king size duvet goes back over both, but when the two halves are separated, the huge duvet needs to go to one side then the other to get under to get at the sheets and blankets to tuck in.

We (I, who am I kidding, only one of us makes the bed) can’t IMAGINE how much harder this would be to make if we had bought a frame, like the one we liked at Pottery Barn. The two halves could not be separated to get in-between to make them, right? I’d be climbing over the beds and reaching in, swearing like a sailor the whole time.
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I’m going to experiment with using different mattress covers, keeping the fitted twins but using a king flat and a king blanket, rather than twins of those. Bottom line, this is an expensive experiment that isn’t going well. The adjustable part of the bed aspect is fine but the housekeeping aspect is anything but fine.

Any words of wisdom?

20 thoughts on “This Story is Really Full of Sheets

  1. The photos online of adjustable beds are all doubles or queens, where it is one mattress, not two. I would not have the patience for such headaches. I want to make the bed in three seconds and go.

    1. Why did you want adjustable beds in the first place? Agree with anon – way too much trouble for me.

      1. Jane: I like the concept of the adjustable bed very much. Eliminates the need for 100 pillows for propping when trying to read or watching TV. It’s the maintenance that has caught me off guard and was never really shown to us when we looked at all the brands.

  2. I’d swear at the metal bars at the end of each mattress. Isn’t it impossible to tuck the sheets and blanket behind that thing? What is it there for anyway?

  3. Why not separate into two large single beds and delagate to guest bedrooms
    in any of your properties. Don’t think you need the Craig’s List used bed shoppers
    darkening your doorway!

    1. That’s probably what will happen. They are great mattresses, a terrific sleeping bed, but the agony of making them takes all the joy out of Mudville.
      Joshing about selling the beds on Craigslist. I have sold other things on Craigslist but to be safe, I had sons come over carrying shot guns while holding back a growling Dawg sporting a spiky nail collar. People came, paid, and left. Quickly.

  4. Hey, you ought to make a YT video on How To make an Adjustable Bed. I Googled it just now and there’s nothing. You could go viral.

    1. We had to let Rosie go when her hormonal batteries were supercharged for Mack the Superintendent robot – she was making their bed and sleeping in it – our beds were left undone.

  5. Bed bath and Beyond sells sheet straps (sheet garters) to keep your fitted sheets tight. Bibi

    1. The problem isn’t the fitted sheet per se – they fit the bed and stay on. The corners are deep pocketed. It’s more that the fabric of the mattress cover under it doesn’t create any friction for the fitted sheet to stay in place. We were told by the TempurPedic people that fitted sheets can and do come off when an adjustable bed so we may have to live with this issue.

  6. i like the knitted jersey covers on the foam mattress toppers from costco. Not slippery at all, but not inexpensive. Still,less than tempurpedic.

  7. one last thought. try taping a flat mattress pad to your EZ surround cover with doubleface carpet tape. then put the fitted sheet on. if the wrinkling disappears, have a seamstress stitch a flat (not fitted) mattress pad to your EZ surround cover.

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